STORIES...
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
I'm not saying I want anything from you... I'm just trying to say I'm sorry... Though I think saying that doesn't make any difference...
Fine! I shouldn't have done that. I should vanish from your life totally...
That's all I have to say to you.
Reminiscing stops at |1:01:00 pm|
Sunday, January 29, 2006
Playing badminton on Chinese New Year!!! Arcade time!!! This is the only time that I always enjoy...
1st Feburary... The day that will end all nightmares... The day that CYY may be coming... After that day, I can be unofficially free!! =D
But before that, I've gotta do what I can for my project at home...
~*~*~*
So sorry... I guess I shouldn't be borne into this world at all... I'm just here to torture everyone... I'm just here to hurt everyone... I'm just here to spoil everyone's life... I should just disappear... I should have disappeared long ago... years ago...
Nobody understands me... Nobody really knows me... Nobody knows who am I or what I want... Though they may think they are correct... but they are not... Because I didn't let anyone come close to the real me... I don't let anyone know what they are supposed to know... about me at least...
I've avoided you before... I've ran away from you before... I did that because I was afraid... When problems come my way, that's the only route I take... I'm always running away from them... The path I've taken caused a lot of pain to you... I knew it will happen... But I didn't know it'll be that bad... To make it worse, I ran further away...
Apologising doesn't help... It doesn't cure anyone from anything completely... It doesn't make anyone forget about what had happened to them... But... I don't know what to do execpt to apologise...
I'm so sorry...
Reminiscing stops at |9:56:00 pm|
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Yesterday was supposed to be my first and last performance by the teachers. We managed to get a half day off... However, not everything went it was planned...
She said she'll only reach at 2plus... She said she'll call me when she reached...
I went for lunch with Addy while waiting for her call...
2plus... no news from her...
gonna 3... still no news...
I msg her to ask where she was. There was no reply...
When I reached school, I called again... No answer...
I called her bro... Can't get through...
I didn't know where she was... She said she'll call! She didn't... Even if she's in Convention, I don't think I can find her. I won't know where she'll be sitting... I can't call her too because there's no reception...
I didn't want to go there alone... I didn't know who was going... I didn't wanna watch with someone I'm not that familiar with... I lost my mood to watch... I decided not to watch... I left school...
When I was at Jurong East... She called... at last... There was lots of interruption... I can't hear her well... Then her bro called... I didn't go... No one persuade me to go... I continued on my journey away from school...
In the train, I was really mad... I was mad at her... Why's she always like this... Always not remembering stuff... The more I see the words "haha" in her messages, the angrier I was.
Why was she still laughing? Shouldn't she apologise for forgetting to call? Doesn't she feel anything except "haha"?
I was so mad that tears somehow gathered in my eyes. I held them back and tried to forget them...
When I reached my destination, I wasn't that mad... Why must I be angry with her? I shouldn't be so dependent on her... on anyone...
I spent my two and a half hours in the library, writting my outdated logbook... while the rest enjoyed the performance in the convention...
I really wanna watch it... but I missed my only chance...
My wait at the library was rewarded with a movie... Oh well... It wasn't a totally disappointing day for me...
Reminiscing stops at |7:51:00 pm|
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
In the morning, she felt a sharp pain in her chest. It was so painful that she had to clutch her chest to ease the pain. Standing up straight was a chore for her. She couldn't take deep breaths as it will cause her to feel more pain. She tried to sit down until she felt better. She could feel some dizziness almost the whole morning.
It's amazing how she managed to reach school on time today!
Before leaving for school, she was doing some last minute touching up for her 2 project presentations. She expected that she'll be late. So, she asked her friend, Mei Hua, to leave for school first. However, when she arrived at the lecture hall, there wasn't a soul in there! It was pitch black!!! Thinking if lecture was cancelled, she decided to call her friend. When she took out her phone, her friend, Nini, called her. Then, she saw students entering the lecture hall. She decided to have a seat in there.
When she entered, she was kinda surprised to see one of her classmate! It was the first lesson for the day. She wanted to smile to her classmate when she faced her but she held back. Why? She was kinda pissed when her classmate greeted her with a black face. Is smiling to her so tough? She decided to ignore her and find herself a seat.
When the lecture ended, she realised that the other half of her clique had left. Thinking back, in the past, they wouldn't do that. They were much closer. They will tell each other that they are leaving first or something... Now, she seldom talks to them. It's not that she expects to know their every movement... But... She feels that things aren't the way it was. Now, she's starting to think if it's becoming "we" and "they"...
She and closer clique (that's how she think of them) tried to find them at the food court but failed. So, they decided together with their other friends.
Feeling unwell since yesterday + what she experienced in the morning, she didn't have appetitte for lunch. Her lunch was left almost untouched...
End of presentations means that end of school for her! She left for CNY shopping with Nini and Addy. They shopped around a few stores and decided to have dinner. After killing millions and billions of brain cells, they came to a conclusion that they'll have dinner at Sakae. She regained her appetitte during dinner time! Maybe the sushi cheered her up! =P
She went home empty handed again. She still hasn't found the top that she saw. She's almost giving up hope to finding it. She's gonna decide to buy some simple, plain tank tops...
~*~*~*
She's feeling guilty for forgetting the dinner date with her poly mates and requested to work on that day... "Sorry" is the only thing she could say. She can't blame anyone for being forgetful. She didn't mean to do it on purpose. She hopes that her friend will not feel angry for what she had done unintentionally. She has cancelled her request for that day but she still doesn't know if it is successful or not.
She was suggesting to have another steamboat another day. It doesn't have to be during the CNY season. It's a good chance to catch up because she thinks that the gap is getting wider and wider. Now, she feels akward just talking to them casually.
She doesn't know if her friend still visits her blog... But... She just don't know how to start a conversation with her once dear friend...
Reminiscing stops at |11:50:00 pm|
Saturday, January 21, 2006
Our finger stands at different heights. it represents the unevenness of the world. The world is never fair... Some stand higher up than others. Me? I'm the one who looks up from the bottom with envy and jealousy... Complaining about life but not doing anything to improve...
Reminiscing stops at |1:19:00 pm|
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Come to think of it, ITP is ending... It's amazing how I managed to hang on till now... I guess it's the longest job I've had so far...
Often, if I didn't really like the job, I would leave... This time, it's different... If I quit, I'll really ruin myself... But at times, clinging on is kinda tough. I've never done office work before.
Though there's some similarities, the differences often appear.
Reminiscing stops at |9:37:00 pm|
Monday, January 16, 2006
It is easy to cry... but holding the tears back is another thing. They just refused to listen to my command...
Reminiscing stops at |7:35:00 pm|
Sunday, January 15, 2006
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Your Link to Free Movies!Any movies you're interested in? It FREE! You can watch it online or download them to your computer! It's not a virus! Open it now!
Click Your Way to Free Movies!
Reminiscing stops at |1:31:00 pm|
Saturday, January 14, 2006
Looking for donors!
Dying... Die... Dead...
~*~*~*
Szhi thinks she really needs to save money. If she doesn't do that, she'll not be able to enjoy life... She thinks that she can go on a diet while saving money. Haha... Is she thinking too much?
Szhi thinks she needs to learn about time management. She's always wasting her time away and has not enough time for things that needs to be done. In the end, she's always complaining about shortage of time. Then... She'll rush things through cmpleting her work just for the sake of completing it. Often, she's not satisfied with what she had done.
Szhi thinks she needs some rest. She's starting to get headaches these days. She knows that she can't take panadol everyday so she tries to bear with it. However, the headache made her quite irritatable. So, she guessed that she had offended a few people these days.
Szhi thinks that she really needs to clean her room. Things are really piling up in her room. Her table is getting worse! Oh my... No one can imagine it's a female's room!
Szhi really wanna go swimming... She wonders where's her Qiu Qiu... It's been a long time since they last went swimming. She's thinking when both of them are able to swim... She suddenly remembered the molesting session when she went swimming with Xiusi... =P
Szhi still hasn't gave up on her choo choo train adventure! She wonders when she is able to execute it.
Right now, Szhi just wishes for her attachment to end soon...
Reminiscing stops at |12:52:00 pm|
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
A person who is always thinking too much... A person who worries too much... A person who is always finding problem for herself...
A person who doesn't think about others... A person who doesn't care about others...
A person who is always avoiding... A person who is always hiding...
A person who is just a nobody... A person who is trying to be a somebody...
A person who is always forcing herself to reach high... A person who always fall...
A person who is drowning within herself...
Reminiscing stops at |11:03:00 pm|
Saturday, January 07, 2006
It was raining since last night. We're all very happy when it was still raining... However, the rain didn't discourage Boss' plan of walking the Tree Top Walk...
Ben planned to be the first to reach but the 2 monkeys who wanted to hitch a ride were late! That's Kenneth and me... =P We're supposed to meet at 8:30am and reach Venus Drive at 9:00am. In the end, we left Yishun at 9:00am... We're the last to arrive.
We can't be blamed! I woke up late... Can't find socks... Missed the bus... Rain slowed down the traffic... Oh! Kenneth had the same problem! He can't find socks!! So... He was forced to wear pink socks!!! Hot Pink! haha...
For me, the route was tough... Steep slopes... Rocky path... Stairs... I walked very slowly especially when I'm descending. The stairs reminds me of that incident. I wanted to hold onto the railings but I was afraid that there were ants on them. Vinz commented about my complains about stairs... =P
The rain wasn't making the walk any easier... Haiz...
When we're on our way back, Karis asked an interesting question. "How long more to the Tree Top Walk???""We've just came down from there! Remember the bridge? The wooden pavement?" Boss answered her. -.-"
We're rewarded with prata after the walk.
Yvonne said something quite interesting... "Pratas are so facinating! It's so small yet 2 pieces of it can make you full for quite some time..." I didn't notice it till she commented on it...
After prata... It was movie time!!
Moonlight in Tokyo. Quite a lame show... but it's kinda nice... =D
~*~*~*
Tml's badminton's cancelled cuz there's no available court... Issit my fault for not booking earlier? Maybe...
Sorry...
But I'm not always slacking in the office... It's the start of the new year. Karis has lots of admin stuff to do. I was helping her. The others were also giving me work to do though it was just bits and pieces of work. The thing that I'm helping Karis is simple... But doing it fast is kinda stressing me. I've been on those files since Monday and I haven't finished it. I still have a basket of name cards waiting... If I didn't have any appointments after work, I'll be staying in the office till I don't know what time.
I don't mind helping to book the courts. I sacrificed some of my time to look for their contacts and call them for availability. I don't think I really mind doing that because I guess I'm fated to do this kinda things for my attachment life. But lots of time is wasted because the internet connection of the com I was using had problem. The page had to be reloaded or refreshed hundreds and thousands of times before it can be fully loaded. I was already kinda pissed...
All I want is just a little appreciation for what I'm doing. Is it so hard?
Reminiscing stops at |8:49:00 pm|
Does anyone knows how I feel when I'm treated that way?
"Who Cares"
Yah... Who cares... right?
~*~*~*
Mistakes... None of us are totally unafraid of them...
Fear is the word...
That word haunts...
Reminiscing stops at |8:46:00 pm|
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Lawyers...A man went to his lawyer and told him "My neighbor owes me $500 and he doesn't want to pay up. What should I do?"
"Do you have any proof?",asked the lawyer.
"Nope," replied the man.
"Okay, then write him a letter asking him for the $1000 he owed you," said the lawyer.
"But it's only $500!" replied the man. "Precisely, that's what he will reply and we will have the proof we need, " said the lawyer.
~*~*~*
The professor of a contract law class asked one of his better students, "If you were to give someone an orange, how would you go about it?"
The student replied, "Here's an orange."
The professor was outraged. "No! No! Think like a lawyer!"
The student then replied, "Okay. I'd tell him 'I hereby give and convey to you all and singular, my estate and interests, rights, claim, title, claim and advantages of and in, said orange, together with all its rind, juice, pulp, and seeds, and all rights and advantages with full power to bite, cut, freeze and otherwise eat, the same, or give the same away with and without the pulp, juice, rind and seeds, anything herein before or hereinafter or in any deed, or deeds, instruments of whatever nature or kind whatsoever to the contrary in anywise notwithstanding..."
~*~*~*
A dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter. Fortunately, the butcher recognised the dog as belonging to a neighbour of his. The neighbour happened to be a lawyer.
Incensed at the theft, the butcher called up his neighbour and said, "Hey, if your dog stole a roast from my butcher shop, would you be liable for the cost of the meat?"
The lawyer replied, "Of course, how much was the roast?"
"$7.98."
A few days later the butcher received a cheque in the mail for $7.98. Attached to it was an invoice that read: Legal Consultation Service: $150.
~*~*~*
"I'm beginning to think that my lawyer is too interested in making money."
"Why do you say that?"
"Listen to this from his bill: 'For waking up at night and thinking about your case: $250."
~*~*~*
The lawyer's son wanted to follow in his father's footsteps, so he went to law school. He graduated with honours, and then went home to join his father's firm.
At the end of his first day at work he rushed into his father's office, and said, "Father, father, in one day I broke the accident case that you've been working on for ten years!"
His father responded: "You idiot, we lived on the funding of that case for ten years!"
~*~*~*
Time Never Goes BackOnce upon a time, there was a teacher and his student lying down under a big tree near a big grass area.
Then, suddenly, the student asked the teacher,
Student : Teacher, I'm confused, how can we find our soul-mate? Can you please help me?
Teacher : (Silent for few second, than he answer) Well, it's a pretty hard and easy question.
Student : (Thinking hard) Huh???
Teacher : Look on that way, there are a lot of grass there. Why don't you walk there but please never walk backward, just walk straight ahead. On your way, try to find a beautiful grass and pick it up then give it to me. But just one.
Student : Well, OK then... Wait for me... (Walked straight ahead to the grass field).
A few minutes later...
Student : I'm back.
Teacher : Hmm, well I don't see any beautiful grass on your hand.
Student : On my journey, I found few beautiful grass, but I thought that I would find a better one, so I didn't pick it up. But I didn't realize that I'm at the end of the field, and I hadn't picked up any. Cause you told me not to go back, so I didn't go back.
Teacher : That's what happened in real life.
What is the message of this story?
* Grass - is people around you
* Beautiful Grass - is people that attract you
* Grass Field - is time
* In looking for your soulmate, please don't always compare and hope that there will be a better one. By doing that, you'll waste your lifetime, cause remember "Time Never Goes Back". It applies the same in finding your ideal life partner, your suitable career or business, therefore the morale is LOVE & grab hold of the opportunity that you have now, don't waste time!
~*~*~*
"A person must be big enough to admit their mistakes, smart enough to profit from them,
and strong enough to correct them."
"The object is not to see through one another, but to see one another through."
"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up."
"It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow."
"Fear is that little darkroom where negatives are developed."
~*~*~*
Stumbled upon
Typiguy's blog while researching... =D
Reminiscing stops at |2:47:00 pm|
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Happy New Year!!!
I just hope everything will go smoothly...
Oh... Yesterday we played bowling!!! It's been a long long time since I last played... Eddie, Addy and I... We played 2 rounds... The first round I was the last as usual... I just got 79... Eddie kept teasing me! He called me "Beck Ham"!!! He said I'm like Beckham... Avoid all the pins! -.- But at the second round, I was the first with a score of 133 Vs 105 n 104!!! hee... So lucky! =D
~*~*~*
I've been having weird dreams these days...
The night before, I dreamt I was crying all the time... There were many people around me... but they're all dead... It's because of a game...
-.-"
Last night... I dreamt I was staying at my old place. But it was on the 5th floor. I wanted to take the lift up. When I was in it, I saw a lady running towards me with her kid. I wanted to hold the lift for her but the door closed immediately. I tried to press the button to get to the 5th storey but it doesn't want to stop. I ended up on the 6th storey... I decided to take the stairs instead. However, no matter how hard I tried, I can't get to the 5th floor...
Reminiscing stops at |1:35:00 pm|
